PUSH



Do you ever think about your life and get this weird feeling in your chest, like something it's pushing and you don't know how to stop it? Like the air is not longer there, as dramatic as it sounds. 

And it's just...crazy, confusing, frustrating.
You sit in your bed at 2am, wondering about nothing and everything. Am I going to remember this exact moment, writing 'till my fingers hurt? Or that feeling I got when I visited a new city for the first time? The loneliness? The best day of my life? Will I be able to forget what is like to cry yourself to sleep? Or the fire in my lungs? Is that a thing you stop feeling and you just, forget? Like it never happened.

That's scary.
The whole concept of "future" is scary, because you've got the world in your hands and you have no idea of what to do with it. And you'll probably never know, nobody does. Some people can pretend they know what they are doing, where they are going...but it's not true. The future is now, the future is here and the future is fucking terrifying.

Because no matter how hard you try, you can't help but think about what's your life going to be in twenty years, or even where you'll be next summer.

I am one of those people that goes around telling others to stop stressing so much about tomorrow; "enjoy this moment, it's not gonna last forever". But sometimes I can't stop the incertitude that grows through my veins, I can't stop the "this is now, and then...what?".

What an hypocrite.


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